MUMBAI: Since ancient times, men have been considered the sole breadwinners of a family. While times have changed now, and women are equally committed to taking care of their homes financially, the expectation is still somewhere from men. There was a time when young men straight out of school would start taking tuition to support their families, and former actress and NGO owner Somy Ali says it’s unfair to put so much pressure on young men.
“The pressure does exist, and it's cultural, and it was the same in the U.S. from the 1950's through the 1970's, where women could only work as nurses or teachers. Men were not necessarily sole breadwinners, but they did make more money as women could only have two professions, which didn't pay much nor offer anticipatory promotions,” she said.
“I am in full agreement with the pressure on young men to an extent where many have even attempted suicide if they fail certain exams while in college. It's completely unfair to put so much pressure on these young men, and particularly in this era, things are necessary to take a complete turn. Both genders should be treated equally, and both do not and should not have any pressure to satisfy others' needs before their own,” she added.
However, she also feels that gone are the days when men would sideline their needs and desires only for the sake of their families. She believes they might delay it but eventually work on fulfilling it. “I have yet to see a man who doesn't fulfill his needs as well as take care of his family. I have not experienced that at all in my upbringing. My mom lived like a queen financially and had access to anything money could buy, while my father was a very successful film producer and director. Therefore, my mother did not need to have a career,” she said.
“Perhaps young men, as in college age boys, think that they have to take care of their parents, as that has been ingrained in their minds since they were children. But grown men, once successful providers, have always taken care of their needs, be it my father, my ex-boyfriends, or even my brother,” she added.
Somy also shared her experience and said that her parents weren't too thrilled that their firstborn was a girl, and they were hoping for a boy. She added, “More my father than my mother, of course. And, to be clear, even at this age, my brother has been given many financial assets because he played by my dad's rules of having a child, and that too was a boy as his firstborn.”
“So, I feel that I have been left on my own accord because I am a woman as opposed to my male cousins and my brother. But then again, I have defied and broken every single societal norm or rule that was forced upon me by my father. I have zero regrets and am quite happy being independent and doing what I love,” she concluded.
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